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It is all about letter writing.
—————————————
“Can you spare a few minutes for me, please?”
“To pull water from the well or to wet- grind for iddli, Ammalu?”
“A much simpler task..I have recovered a few handwritten letters from the archives. I will read the caption; you tell me the context. None of my friends could give me the correct answer. I’m sure you will, being the most knowledgeable among us”
“Thank you for accepting my knowledge status. Go ahead”
“Letter 1:
At the top center, the word OHM is written big.On the top left, the word ,’safe’ and on the top right, name of the place and below that the date.The letter starts with “‘Respected Madam’ and ends with ‘I remain, will remain ever, YOURS MOST OBEDIENT”
“It is a leave application, the promise of future obedience was unnecessary though.”
” Thank you.
Letter 2:
.
OHM in the top center, Below that ‘Mahaganapathayae namah’ and below that ‘avignamashtu’.,invocation to Lord Ganesh to remove obstacles. Below that ‘Sri Cherunetturi Bagavathy Sahayam’ invocation to the family deity seeking Her blessings for the success of the task in hand.. The four corners of the letter is yellowish, probably due to the the turmeric touch. The contents, I shall read latter”
“No need to take the trouble of reading the content. It is a marriage invitation . For your wedding,your father didn’t spend a pie for printing invitations and he posted post cards.That is why, you could not identify a marriage invitation letter”
” Thanks again, for remembering my father.
.
Letter 3: No caption.
In big letter,” My life savior, save me, save me! I’m sinking in an unfathomable, boundary-less ocean. Save me, Oh, Savior!
Below that pencil sketches of eye drops falling.’
” Ammalu,Some cranky fellow would have posted that letter in the letter box expecting that it would be delivered to the God. The world is never short of
undiluted idiots”
“Thanks again.
Letter 4:
This is on a stamp paper.
“Me——-, son of Sri.——–, now living in house no.—–in a village called —-under the Revenue territory of ——–, in —–Taluk, which was a part of —-Taluk, now a part of—–, in —-state, hereby solemnly declare that I”ll, from the moment this documented is signed by both the parties, self attested and registered,shall abide by all the conditions, stipulations, directions, orders in writing or verbal and————. — It goes like that”
“Ignore. Seems to be some legal document, Ammlau”
“Could be. Thank you. Now Letter 5:
.
pranamams or salutations :
I fall at the feet of your revered father..
I touch the feet of your most revered mother.
My salutations to other elders, in your family, living or left or likely to leave in the near future,
My salutations to the eight corners of your house.
My salutations to your main gate, entrance door, cattle shed, well and ventilators. And last but not least, my salutations to the soil on which you tread your lotus feet”
” Ammalu,this is from a samskrita hymn, Pranamasathakam. An ardent devotee would have written to his Ishtadevatha, favorite deity”
“Wrong, my dear husband wrong.. All these were the love letters, you had sent to your real or imaginary girl friends, during your college days. I too mistook those for wedding invitation, leave application etc till I picked up one, with a prominent central title, ‘LOVE LETTER’, artistically bordered and each letter painted in different colors.
I have not seen or heard about an young man prominently writing ‘love letter’ in the message he sends to his lover”
”Sorry, Ammalu, I agree that I should not have written those words in block letters”
 

After serving in Dubai for three years, when he returned home for vacation, he brought two golden necklaces, one each for his mother and wife.

The problems an over-obedient wife can create for you- just for fun. Read and forget, don’t carry home.
”Good morning, Sir. May I come in? I came to join your yoga class.”
“Please come in and take your seat. You look a bit worried. Anything wrong?”
“Nothing. I dropped my key ring. Looking around for someone to pick it up for me”
”It is there, on the carpet, right under your leg”
“Usually, I call my wife to pick up things which I drop inadvertently”
” But your wife is not here. That lady, coming out of the kitchen with your coffee is my wife and she won’t pick up your key ring. In fact, I pick from the floor everything she drops and there is a reason for that. Shall I pick up the key for you?”
“No Sir, I will do it”
.
”Have you sprained your neck?”
“No, Sir”
“Your teeth are in friendly terms with the gums?”
“Yes, Sir”
”If you are absolutely certain that your head or teeth won’t fall off when you bend, why are you hesitating to bow down and pick up the key?”
”No hesitation. I ‘m not used to. That is all. Anyway, I have picked up my key now ”
“Stand up on the floor, drop the key again and pick up. Drop and pick up like that, twenty times in two minutes”
“The yoga class has already started?”
“Yes. It has.”
“With no prayers, no pranayamam practice?”
“Yes. That is my way of teaching. If you dislike my teaching, you may withdraw”
“No, Sir. I won’t withdraw. Shall I drop the key again?”
”No need, if the count suggested is over. Go home, do everything on your own and don’t seek your wife’s help”
“But my wife is a very kind and considerate woman. She won’t allow me to do any of my personal routines”
“can you change her habit?”
”Has any husband succeeded in changing the habits of his woman?”
“Wise and valid question. Then, have another wife who will sit on your head, and not at your feet waiting for the fall of the car key”
“Has any husband been able to change his wife on his own volition?”
“Another wise and valid question. Remember one thing. Your wife is turning her body and soul fit like a fiddle by performing all physical activities at home while you are only blotting and aging faster than her. You know what happens if you age faster than your wife?”
“Now, you are asking me a wise and valid question, Sir. She might go away from me and sit on the head of someone else”
”Yes. You want that to happen?”
“No Sir”
“Then go home and–”
“Drop my car key twenty times and pick it up within two minutes, three times a day”
” Yes. The class went on well today. You can come again next Sunday. See you. Good bye”
”Sir I dropped the key again, inadvertently”
” I see. It has now become a habit for you. Don’t practice the same exercise at home and don’t wait till next Sunday. Come tomorrow itself by walk, so that there is no possibility of dropping the car key”
“Five miles by walk?”
”Yes, let me see whether that too becomes a habit. If so, you don’t need any yoga classes”
”And my caring and considerate wife will have no part in my walk thereby no chance of her become younger than me”
“Your mind too has become brighter by my lessons. Have always that fear so that you both will lead an active life”
”Isn’t it that fear behind your habit of picking up everything your wife drops on the floor, Sir ?”
“You said it”

“I had to bow my head in shame when Ammini asked,’what are you doing all the time sitting at home SP Sir? Braiding Ammalu’s hair?”

“Was Nair there, when she chided you?”

“Yes, he was there”

“And he didn’t say a word to support you?”

“No, he was busy braiding Ammini’s hair”

“How intelligent Ammini is! That is how one woman helps another woman, one wife helps another wife. That is how they teach husbands like you, through visual and verbal aids. Yesterday, observing a wound in my hand she decided to tell you, to help me. Her questing to you was in fact, a suggestion, a request.”

“How did she knew the time of my visit, to ask Nair to sit behind, holding her hair? Or was he sitting behind her, right from the morning to give a visual effect?”

”Why didn’t you ask her that question on the spot, instead of bending your head in shame, when she asked you, were you sitting braiding your wife, the whole day?

A tiger before me, you turn into a mouse before Ammini”

”Ammalu, why all these visual and verbal weapons and virtual attacks on me. You could have asked Ammini to braid your hair till your wound is healed “

“I wanted Ammini to enjoy her husband sitting behind and balding her hair”

“Oh, that is how one woman helps other; one wife helps another wife!”

“You got it right. The comb is in the first drawer of the mirror table”

“Ammalu, when I walk towards the Vishukani, closing my eyes, my sight has improved nowadays”

“Sight, with closed eyes?”

”You started arguing right from the New Year dawn ! Now on, the whole year, you will continue with such useless, merit-less, value-less arguments”

“When you shut your eyes, you are sightless temporarily. One doesn’t need a University degree and three PG diplomas to say that, to know that”
“Ammalu, the problem with you is, that before I complete a sentence, you intervene unnecessarily.I wanted to say that,compared to last year, I am now able to walk more confidently, when I shut my eyes”
“Oh, there are two reasons:
1.I am holding your hand more firmly now as you have added one year to your age since the last Vishu.
and
2.This year, the power cuts were for longer duration and your system is better tuned now to walk in darkness”
“The second point I agree to. Regarding the first point, I have a small query: Has your age come down now by one year, since the last Vishu, madam?”
”It has, in fact. When I have a husband like you, nothing goes up, including my age”
“What other Vishukaineettam do you need, my queen! Come and hold both hands firm. Let us dance and celebrate the Vishu.”
“Power cut?”
“Merrier!”

” Ammalu, while organizing Vishukkani, keep 3 pieces of one Rupee coins in a silver bowl. One Rupee for you and the rest for Ammini and Nair if they come to take my blessings tomorrow morning”

“Even for your best friend Ammini, you will give only one Rupee as kaineetam!?

“When it comes to the question of parting with money, I don’t differentiate between a wife, however old she is and a friend, however close she might be”

“No wonder she told me yesterday,” instead of coming to collect SP Sir’s one Rupee kaineettam, I can go to KKAS”

“KKAS, what is that?”

“That is a new commercial service which helps to tide over the mosquito menace –, ‘Kerala Kosu adi samgham’. You simply go there with empty hands,stretching your palms straight and clap with a ‘thud’ sound. At least a dozen Mosquitoes get trapped, die and drop. You are paid a Rupee per mosquito, caught and killed, on the spot. No investment, no efforts, at least a thousand Rupees income in an hour”

“it is a herculean task, to be a husband; to be your husband, to be more specific, Ammalu. Do you know who was Hercules? How will you, poor thing? You don’t even know our own mythological characters. Hercules was a Roman hero, who carried the globe over his head ”
“Hercules is the Roman name for the Greek divine hero Heracles.
It was the Titan Atlas, from Greek mythology, who carried something very heavy, possibly the weight of the world, on his shoulders. It might be more accurate to say he carried the heavens on his shoulder.Hercules carried the weight only for a short while, when the Titan Atlas went to fetch the apples of the Hesperides,
When you can’t produce originals, at least copying should be done accurately, my learned husband”
“See how you argue unnecessarily, stupidly, arrogantly! That is why I say, it is a herculean task to be a husband, to be more specific your husband, Ammalu”
“Hercules was given “Twelve Labours”,which required twelve extremely difficult tasks, Shall I tell you what were those twelve tasks? ”
“Ammalu, please, please, spare me from any more tasks, burdens and mythology..Being your husband is the most easiest, pleasant task in the world, undoubtedly”