Category: A12– Everything under the Sun

  • Ammalu is always right

    img_6913

    Cartoonist. Ramki of Chennai
    ‘While my grandmother was alive, she used to give me oil bath twice a week. Then, my mother followed that good practice. I had to simply sit on a stool; they applied oil, massaged all over the body and after half an hour washed from head to toe with cheekai powder and removed water with a dry towel. They both said, ‘your wife will continue this good practice. But that did not happen. Now, I have to take bath my self. What a pity, Ammalu!’

    ‘Say so! I was wondering how could one woman spoil you to this level of degradation! There were two behind your ruin!’


    ‘A bit more intelligence, a bit more beauty, a bit more managerial skill would have made you a wonderful wife, Ammalu’

    ‘To make you a good husband all those qualities are required. not in bits and pieces but in tons, SP’

    —————–

     


     

     

  • Olavakkode stories to my rescue

    26940652901_29917bf6b2_o.jpg

    My wife trusted me but not my words. My teachers trusted neither me nor my words. My employer spent most of his time watching through the glass partition to see whether I was in my seat or not. Nothing abnormal in any of their behavior. But, my daughter, my only daughter, to whom I used to buy kadalai mittai, peanut toffees, for ten paisa everyday, disbelieving me?

    While driving to her work, every early morning she talks to me on FaceTime and today, she enquired whether I had followed her instructions on the treatment for my feet-itching.

    For the past one week, she has been asking me to apply coconut oil and then liquid moisturizers and then use socks, during day times.

    I ignored. I tried to turn her attention.
    ‘How bad is the early morning fog, over there?’

    ‘Don’t change the topic, please. Have you applied the oil and lotion I suggested and covered your feet or not? Say ‘yes’, say ‘no’.

    She didn’t give me time to think of an excuse and I had to instantly tell her a lie.

    ‘Yes, Konthai, I have.’

    ‘Show me your feet’

    That was an unexpected blow!

    ‘You drive carefully’, I tried to escape .

    ‘Appa, I asked you to show me your feet’

    No escape. I showed her my feet. I could dodge my wife, my teacher my employer, but not my daughter.

    Lo and behold! My feet were covered with socks.

    But how? I never wore. Is some MalayAlam mantravAdam roaming here without my knowledge?

    My face turned blue with fear but my daughter was pleased .

    ‘Good dad. Have you bought the medicine which I asked you to buy?’
    I didn’t. But I said ‘yes’ instantly, expecting the MalayAla mantravAdam to work.

    ‘Show me please’, she ordered.
    I searched the entire medicine chest. It was not there.

    ‘What do you say now? Why did you lie to me?’

    ‘Me, lying to you, my only daughter for whom I used to buy peanut toffees ( intentionally I didn’t use the old fashioned name ‘kadalaimittai’)

    ‘Ok, dad! Pack off from there. You have a serious memory problem and it is not safe to leave you there ‘

    ‘Memory problem? Are you kidding Aparna?’

    ‘I’m not. You forgot that you wore socks. You forgot that you did not buy the medicine. These lapses, despite my telling you everyday, for the past one week’

    ‘Shall I tell you the selected words with which your mom used to scold me, to convince you that my memory is as fresh as MuttaikAri’s mittais?’

    ‘MuttaikAri? Who is she?’

    ‘She was a Rajasthani woman from whom Appa bought our house some seventy years ago. There was rumor, a strong one, that she killed her husband who was a Brahmin, came to Olavakkode and started a mittai or sweetmeat shop. As a kid of eight, I used to enjoy the charm of her face, always glittering with a concealed smile and the folds on her long and fair hands falling generously’

    ‘Dad, you are talking to your daughter!’

    ‘So what? She was eighty then and me eight’

    ‘And what else?’ ‘

    Who won’t be captivated by my story telling skill! I continued:

    ‘She had a caged parrot, which used to talk often. ‘Rukmini, pAl konduva! Get me milk, Rukmini- was the parrot’s favorite usage, imitating her mistress.

    ‘Who was Rukmini? Another old woman, Mittai’s cattle shed caretaker. Rukmini used to sit in a corner of the back yard and smoke churuttu, country cigarette, spreading her long hairs, after completing her chores and a fresh bath every night. Banian Venkataraman, from Perinkulam, who halted for a night at our house, got up at midnight for easing his bladder and seeing smoke and fire emanating from her mouth, mistook her for a yakshi and screamed in fear. Shall I tell you about the skin folds which hanged on her dark hands?’

    ‘No need. Your memory is strong. You can continue to stay there. But, keep an your MalayAlam mantravAdi.’

    ‘Thank you konthai!

    ‘And don’t forget to buy the medicine I suggested’

    ‘Yes, konthai. Drive safe’

    PS. Imagination has negligible role in the Olavakkode story. In fact, I have narrated those incidents earlier in one of my blogs

  • Habsiguda chef and his adventures

    Rs 210. Basic pay was too big an amount for a fresh BSc in 1958. But my Appa said, ‘no, I can’t send my son to Assam’

    ‘It is an attractive post as a Silt Analyst with hopes for raising’, I tried to convince him. My father and my wife both shared a good habit- if they say, ‘no’, under no circumstances, it could turn into ‘yes’.

    ‘No’, said my wife when I suggested, ‘why don’t we have one more child?’ , two years after my fourth child, my third son, was born. The year was 1985 and I was to retire in 1994. She had, perhaps, that date in mind.

    Anyway, that is a different story.

    Now, coming to dosai, my daughter through FaceTime had given clear instructions which I followed strictly, but my dosai refused to get up from the tawa in a single form. Two, three, six pieces were tolerable, not twenty. I never give up. Ok, if not dosa, idli. Where is the idli vessel? It was very much there and after pouring the mix, I found that the central rod linking the plates was missing. I have told you that story. I was, as disappointed as I was, when Appa said ‘no’ to my Assam job, in 1958.

    Shivam Perinkulam never gives up. Had it been so, he would not have become a husband after being rejected by almost every eligible girl, this side of the Vindhya hills! No husband meant no father, no father meant no USA, U.K. or Europe or Switzerland trips. Olavakkode, Perinkulam, Hyderabad, maximum Kasi, Rameswaram!

    A new idea cropped up this morning. Why not make a paste of rice and mix with the bulk stock, sleeping in the fridge!

    Hip, hip hurray! It worked. The first trial dosa was a thick one; then on, no going back.

    Vicha Anna was excited, Yadamma enjoyed eating, fully opening her mouth.

    ‘Dosa, chAla bAgunthi’- madam Y ( maid servant Yadamma)

    ‘Onnu koodi’ Mr. V ( brother Vicha )

  • A tree in a temple premises

    img_6512

    A lamp before a deity or shrine, yes, understandable. Flowers at the feet of a deity, understandable. But, why those at the feet of a tree? Are these people mad?

    Imagine how old would have been this tree. Certainly it would have been standing there seeing several summers and winters. Certainly, it would have seen several devotees coming to the temple, would have given shelter to them and perhaps fruits too. It will continue to do so for many more years. Even after all devotes have left for home, even after the doors of shrines are shut, the tree stands there meditating. It doesn’t go to sleep. When the devotees comes next morning welcomes them with freshness bubbling on their face! No complaint of not getting sleep the previous night. Like that several nights have passed by, but still the tree has remained fresh, happy and ready to welcome devotees. Is not this tree worth worshipping?

    Mountains , hills, rivers, trees, animals, aakAsam, space, air, Vaayu, bhoomi, the earth, Agni, fire, all were worshipped by our ancestors. They found divine presence in everything. No, they found them as Devine, as gods themselves. The result was they realized their own divinity and tried to be honest, truthful, caring, loving, compassionate, kind.

    The god in trees and hills and rivers theory worked extremely well for generations and continues to work to a great extend even now.

    That belief is good. Let not enter in my mind all sorts of doubts and new theories to nullify my inherited ancestral asset.

    Let me place a few flowers and light a mud lamp at the feet of the tree.

  • Onion chutney expert

    Savithri was in such a hurry when she entered my house that I thought her husband was hiding behind me and she had come to pick him up.

    ‘He is not here’, I made the position clear without waiting for her asking.

    ‘Who is not here?’ She asked.

    ‘Your husband’

    ‘Who wants that old man? I came for you’

    ‘But, I’m older to him’

    ‘Anna, your jokes are always enjoyable like pulitchamor( soured buttermilk)’

    ‘Why call me ‘Anna’? Aren’t you older to me?’

    ‘Again jokes!’

    ‘Like pulitchamor?!

    ‘Anna, enough of this. I came for a help.

    ‘Want to borrow some Sundari cheekai powder?’

    ‘Jokes again! I want you to make some onion chutney for me’

    ‘What! You think I’m a cook ?’

    ‘You are. That is what everyone says. And your onion chutney is superb, I’m told’

    ‘Everyone said that?’

    ‘Not everyone. Our Parukutty said . She saw your post and your picture with a bowlful of onion chutney’

    ‘Parukutty said? Ok. Parukutty, you are out of my friends circle !’
    Love,
    Shivam Perinkulam
    Sent from my iPad

  • Is not my Hyderabad life exciting?

    I have noted that after retuning back home, my ledger of problems never shows a Nil balance. Solve one, another problem is waiting behind.
    So, I have found a way. I don’t treat any of those as ‘problems’ and give importance.

    Result- I have now only events and not problems!

    Events come and go. I attend to those but don’t watch for the results. That helps.

    In America too I had problems during the second half of my stay there. That was solely related to my health. But, the load on me was minimum, as I was not the load- bearer! There were many, my daughter in law Meghana mainly, my son, daughter and others.

    No charm if your load is carried by others! You should carry it on your head.

    Hyderabad life is exciting despite many problems I am facing.

    Oh, I said I have no problems. Let me continue with the new name,’events!’

    While serving food for my brother Vicha, my landline rings. Vicha, either didn’t hear or didn’t want to hear. I too ignore the rings.

    Phone stops but rings again. I go near the phone when Vicha wants one chutta pappadam- baked pappad. I go to the kitchen. The phone rings again. I pick it up. It is Kundalakesi. Her name is kumudam, but I call her Kundalam to respect the big kodakkadukkans hanging from her small ear lobes. Kodakkadukkans are ear-ornaments in the shape of umbrellas.

    ‘Anna, are you free coming Sunday?’, she enquires.

    ‘Why, you are calling me for food in hotel Kubhera?’

    ‘No, Anna, my daughter is delivering a female baby’

    ‘How do you know the baby is going to be female?’

    ‘My daughter was in USA ‘

    ‘Ok, but in what way am I going to be helpful in the maternity ward?’

    ‘You have a task there; my Anna, you can do it’

    ‘You expect me to apply my Malayalam manthravAdam and convert the baby to male ?’

    ‘No, I want you to take her to the hospital’

    ‘Shall send my car with the driver. Why should I come?’

    ‘No, Anna. I want you to write her horoscope on the spot’

    ‘I’m not an astrologer !’

    ‘That is ok. But you can bluff and convert the Moolam star into Makham. ‘Moolathu mAmiyar mukkilae’ you know!’

    ‘My bluff can do many things but not convert a star to another one. I’m sorry. And I don’t believe in such rubbish that one star is worse than another. My son Srikanth is Moolam- born. His mother in law is not sitting in a corner.. She is a world trotter’

    ‘Anna, my belief is unshakeable . I want the baby to be born only in Makham star’

    ‘Tell the doctor and get the surgery on the day you want’
    ‘ I tired. Makham is too far. Can’t wait till then, doctor says’

    ‘One more chutta pappadam!’ Vicha demands.

    I close my talk with my friend.

    You won’t believe the other day, I had a call from a relative, mother of an MTech boy from IIT Chennai, decently employed. His star is Moolam and his mother says she has problem to find a match.

    Will we never come out of these obsolete thoughts?

    I was born in Hastham star, born after great prayers from my mother. But the women in the neighborhood expressed fear about my father’s longevity. They had an example in my father. He was also Hastham born and his father passed away soon after he was born. My father with multi health problems passed away only after I crossed forty. My second son Atchu is Hastham born. I’m sure, whether you accept or not, I’m alive!

    Now, tell me. Is not my Hyderabad life exciting?
    Love,
    Shivam Perinkulam
    Sent from my iPad

  • Happy birthday, Sharat

    September 28 th is a memorable day for me as my eldest son Ananth ( Sharath/ Kuttan for me ) was born on that day, over forty years ago.
    Those moments the parents wait to have a first look at the face of the first child ( or the faces of the subsequent children) are always packed with unalloyed joy and anxiety and so many other feelings which can’t be explained in words. In the case of my wife and myself, not the moments but the months we waited to see our first baby was explainable in words- we simply wanted to have a normal child! . We had no other ambition. Reason- we feared, threatened by a gynecologist friend, that there was a possibility that the child might not be a normal one, consequent to the effect of certain medicines, my wife was taking during pregnancy.

    ‘Come what may, we will have the baby’, decided we both, despite discouraging suggestions and advices from some medical friends we were surrounded with, then. And that was the best decision we took in our life. And the happiest moment in our life was when on child birth, the pediatrician certified that the baby was perfectly normal.

    Sharath, like his mom and unlike his dad, is a man of a few words, good, intelligent, meaningful, timely and apt. He likes, again like his mom, the best of everything and there can’t be a better example for that than Megh, his life partner. ( you may like to add that his mom’s selection of me proves my point!😌) He resembles his paternal grand father, whose name he bears, in looking after his parents and I can never forget the affection and care I received from him and Megh, when I fell seriously ill last year.
    I wish my Kuttan a long life along with his wife and children and the best of it, as he always opts for the best.

    Happy birthday Sharath.

     

     

     

  • My mother

    image

     

    All children are god’s gifts for their parents but I was more so as I was a Bagavath prasAdam, god’s blessings to my mother’s soul-full prayers after she lost her seemanthaputran, first child hardly one year old, who bore our ancestral name for the eldest child of the family, Vancheeswaran. The tsunami of small pox which swept Palakkad during those days, snatched the child as well as her one eye, though it spared the life of my father, luckily for her, for me and my siblings and also for our grandmother. My mother too would have become a prey to the fearsome virus but for the day and night vigil of her mother in law, Ammalu, my paternal grand mother, a very kind and capable woman and that debt was paid back to her by my father by caring her in her old age, like his own eyeball.

    ‘I have observed ‘Shasti vratham’ during the entire period I carried you and I’m confident that you won’t go the wrong way, now or ever’ – those words of my mother has been my safety belt throughout my life.

    I feel guilty for not paying back to my mother at least a portion of the affection and care she showered on me, as like my sisters who left home during their early twenties, I too left home and subsequently my parents stayed with me only on a few occasions. I was lucky to be with my father to take care of him during his last days and also do the last rites but in my mother’s case, I could reach home only after her cremation was offer. The destiny allotted that duty and fortune to my brother, Vicha.
    Is the task if attending him now allotted to me, just to clear a portion of my old debts to my mom?

    The work allotment and wage payments are made by the Master strictly as per our deserving. Have no doubt on that.

    You will get what you are due to.

  • Anantha Jyothy’, my Habsiguda house

     

    ‘Anantha Jyothy’, my Habsiguda house – takes birth. Bhoomipooja, nearly four decades ago, in the presence of my mother, who was fortunately available at Hyderabad then. She did stay for short periods in this house later, but my father did not, though I was happy that he lived to see the completion of the house to comment ‘a hundred people can be served food at a time, in your two halls, Konthai!’. (The old people always thought about serving food to others! )

    Earlier, when he came to see the vacant land, the approach roads were not good as the housing colony was just taking shape. He had to pass through a water -clogged patch when he commented: ‘ to reach your house, I have to swim or fly’.

    Swimming was no problem for him and I would have brought him by a helicopter, if necessary, but he passed away before I could shift to my house. That house, though a Nalukettu, a big one, didn’t have modern facilities but my parents preferred to continue to stay there. To reach the bathroom and toilet, they had to carry an umbrella during rains, but that was not a problem for them- for us too when we were children. When I went during holidays, I saw a snake happily crawling over my sisters when they were sleeping on a veranda with openings to the backyard! But for them, that house was Swargam , paradise, as my mother used to claim proudly!

    I say the same now, to my children !

    As my son Atchu said, ‘it is not the walls and doors that make the house, but the memories and sentiments surrounding it’

    My children are aware of my sentiments but they insist on my staying with them, considering my age and health aspects. Let me hold on here, as long as I can!

    But how long?

    The lady with dark glasses in the foto is Dr. Malathy Damodaranmy, daughter of EMS Nambudiripad.
    Dr. Malathy was my college at NIN. Damodarans were my neighbors in the NIN campus too and we chose the neighboring plots hoping to live close by. It didn’t happen.

  • The story of an umbrella and a stick

    The story of an umbrella and a stick.

    My father used to say that in our families, women live longer than men. An exception was my wife and fortunately for him, he preceded her.

    There has to be a scientific basis for every happening unless the celestial masters opt to intervene in human affairs. Now, I discovered the reason for the longevity of women in my family- they were all housewives!

    How do house wives live longer. They are active always, physically and mentally. Their brain is alert and limbs on motion throughout their waking life!

    Yes, during my short tenure as ‘house keeper’, I have found that
    a house wive does maximum physical and mental exercise as a matter of routine, as necessitated by her job. See my case. I don’t go to Gym nowadays and there is no need for that as I shuttle a hundred times between hall, kitchen, verandas, portico and backyard and font gate of my house.

    Why to the front gate? To buy vegetables, raw maize and many other items after bargaining from the vendors who come to our gate to sell. Time has to be set aside to chat with the neighbors who come out of their houses seeing my face, as if they were waiting from the morning for me to come out for discussing on various issues, some of them of extreme importance.

    Now coming to the mental exercise. See how active and alert my mind has to be.

    The servant woman, YAdamma, switches on the lights and fans in all rooms before sweeping the floors and swabbing and despite repeated instructions, doesn’t put those off when the need is over. So, I keep a watch peeping into all the rooms. Suddenly, I remember that I forgot to switch off the stove which I should have done ten minutes before. I rush to the kitchen. The water kept for heating had already transformed into vapors and the bottom of the vessel had started turning black. The servant asks, ‘eami Saar, maritchupoyAra?- you forgot?’ That was her way of teasing me for blaming her for not switching off the lights and fans!

    My brain starts working. How to pay back this old woman in the same coin?
    Vicha Anna asks, ‘Anna Chukku vellam is not ready yet?’

    ‘Vicha, your water has gone up!’ I tell him .

    ‘When did water started going up?’ He asks to tease, ‘water finds its way to go down!’

    No time to argue with him. I keep another vessel full of water when driver Ali asks for an umbrella. I tell him that I have only one umbrella and I need it. ‘Then, how will go I back home, Sir?’, he asks as if it was written in my employment offer that I should provide him with an umbrella or rain coat when it rains.

    ‘Don’t go’. I tell him in anger.

    ‘Teekey, Saheb, chai banavo’ – ‘ok, make tea for me’.

    ‘Naaku kooda chaya kAvAli Sir’ I too want tea, says Yadamma, the servant woman.

    ‘Didn’t Lakshmi give you?’ I ask her. Lakshmi, our cook, has gone back after finishing her morning duty.

    ‘She gave, but a cat came, tilted the tumbler’

    ‘I let out the cat to tilt your tea tumbler?’, I ask her.

    I go in search of the cat in each and every corner and in that process, locate an umbrella behind the built in cupboard.

    ‘When did I buy this umbrella?’ I ask myself. To the best of my knowledge I haven’t spent a pie to buy an umbrella or a rain coat or a hat.

    ‘Could it be my KasiyAtra umbrella? There was a stick too which Amman, my father in law presented to me during my wedding, Where is that? I search for the stick in every nook and corner and Yadamma reminds that the water kept for Vicha had again gone as vapor.

    ‘Chukku vellam ready Atcha, Anna?’ He enquires.

    ‘The water has gone up again,’ comments YAdamma.

    ‘Saheb, chatri hena aapka hatmae?’, – there is an umbrella in your hand!’, teases Ali.

    ‘But where is the stick?’ , I ask him.

    ‘What stick?’, he asks in bewilderment.

    ‘Sir is looking for a stick to chase cat,’ Comments Yadamma.

    ‘But, where is cat? It would have reached London now!’ Comments Ali.

    I go almost mad! What else do you need to keep mind alert and active which, combined with physical movements, leads to longevity?

    No, but that is not the end of the story. The stick which I was searching for is hanging from another corner! That makes me sad, very sad. The person who gifted the umbrella and stick and also many others who were present then, are no more. Even the girl for whose wedding those were gifted is no more, but the bloody umbrella and stick are still alive.

    I have a good habit. I switch over from negative thoughts to positive thoughts quickly. I console myself: ‘ you think only about yourself. Your umbrella and stick are already dead and gone. The one you see now belongs to your son!’

    Oh, those are great treasures to be preserved. I remove those, clean and hang in the original places!

    ‘Chatri – umbrella!’ Ali asks

    Yadamma asks for stick to chase the cat.

    No, I don’t give them. I keep those in a safe place.