“More you give, more you get”. What is it?
‘Help’
‘No, abuses’
”More you fill up, more you have space’ . What is it?
‘Cotton wool bag’
‘No. Desire’
“More you gift ; more she asks for?’ Who is that?
‘Your wife’
‘No, Chethal, wood worms’
‘More wrongs ; more pinches ‘. Who is that?
‘Your class teacher’
‘No. Your conscious’
Woman is born as woman.
But, man becomes one by training.
Train your baby son to become a man!
Singing is a Devine experience. Singing and hearing, fully understanding the bhAva of the composer and experiencing a bit of his feelings, is an inexplainable anuboothi, experience.
Those interested in Carnatic music should try to understand the bhAvam, the feelings of the composer so that they can enjoy the music, better.
‘Did you come all the way walking, to protect me?,’ asks Thyagaraja to Sree Rama, addressing Him as, ‘nA prAnanAthA!’
‘Nannu pAlimpa nadasivochithivo?’.
In another song, he asks, ‘Ela nEe dayarAdu?’ Continue reading Many times in our life we don’t talk when we should
That strike was so harsh that I thought the world had come to an end.
No, it hadn’t.
After a while, I realized that the world was very much there and only I had gone blind and deaf.
Again after sometime I could hear a melody flowing in the air.
I was not deaf!
Then, in a dim light, I could see a lovely hand lifting me up from the ground.
I was not blind!
Slowly I realized that the hand which lifted me up, wiped off my tears and pain was the same as the one that slapped me earlier.
‘Come on, let us move,’ a whisper into my ears, ‘ you have a purpose to live’
I picked up courage and asked ,’ what about my things, which I lost?’
‘They were not yours’ The reply was cool. ‘If they were, they would have come with you’
‘I didn’t get you,’ I seek a clarification. ‘Have I lost everything?’
‘No, you have me with you. You are mine and I’m yours’
‘Why did you slap at my face, if I’m yours?’
‘Naaku eami thelusu? What do I know?’
That was followed by a sweet laugh .
The melody of that laugh intermingled by the moving sound of steps, is imbedded in my memory.
But where is He?
‘Naaku eami thelusu?’
We are all shining objects but with a black dot on our head!
‘Janma, mrithyu, jaraa thaptha
Jana visraanthi daayini!’
is one of the namas of Ambal in the Lalithasahasranamam, one can meditate upon, for long.
‘You are the ultimate solace for the sufferers from the routine of birth, aging and death, Mother!’
The Samskritham hymns give you immense happiness if you recite those understanding their meaning. ( Even otherwise, you go to Swargam, say learned men. But that is not my aim. I think only about the life here).
I’m yet to meet a single person in my long walk of life, who haven’t suffered the pangs of living in one way or the other.
Super rich, ultra successful, extremely intelligent all undergo pain, unbearable pain mental and physical at some stage or the other in their life.
Last week , while in my son in law ‘s house in Florida, a close relative, a successful professional, who was once and whose children are now in high position, mentioned that there is a small black dot in every manjadikuru, മഞ്ചാടിക്കുരു, which is otherwise uniformly, bright, polished, colorful, attractive. You know manjadikurus are the uniformly oval shaped redseeds, heaped in a big metal vessel, before the sanctum of Guruvayoorappan.
I’m aware of the story behind that, but when the relative compared the knock everyone, however big, receives on his head from the Destiny, for a moment, I thought, ‘could it be to remind us that suffering is very much a part of life, those bright red seeds with a black dot at the end are placed at the entrance of the temple?’
When we collect them in our cupped palms and drop we tell God, ‘yes, Lord, we are aware of our plight, but make your knock on our head, tolerable, please!’
More over the seeds have uniform weight and that was why old goldsmiths were using those for measuring. Yes, for Him, we are of the same weight. You may be the brightest and me, the dullest but for Him, we are all shining objects of uniform size, of course with a black dot on our head, a knock -mark from the Fate!
( Images from the web)
If you are shining and spreading light, there is someone behind you burning and turning into charcoal. It could be your wife at home, who makes your food and bed and after feeding and putting the kids to sleep, awaits for your late return from the office. It could be your parents, who burnt their life and turning into charcoal and struggling to survive. It could be even you, yourself, burning your life for shining and in the process getting aged faster.
But, one thing is certain. For something to shine, something else has to burn and turn into charcoal.
Our animal sacrifices in the olden days, were the symbols of this idea. In parched area, to find water in a village well, they used to sacrifice an animal. May be a superstition. But, even superstitions are based on some thoughts, experience. You may accept or not. Many traditional thoughts, I don’t follow. That doesn’t mean that those thoughts were absolutely hollow. If I don’t accept, I reap the good or bad of it. That is all.
I have been observing that many good men suffer in life and die in pain. Most of them are honest, kind, courteous, generous in helping the needy. Not only that, they have been followers of the rule of the land as well as the prescriptions of the scriptures. Why should they suffer?
I have also been observing that many selfish, greedy, rotten rouges live happily and die happily. How and why?
So, it appears to me, that Life as well death do not differentiate between good and bad! That is admitting what I have been taught from my childhood, is not correct. The neethisastrams,
holy scripts, epic stories, elementary school moral classes, all were waste!
‘Your tongue deserves chopping for saying that,’ I hear you saying, ‘the seeds sown in this birth, give fruits in the life -after death or next birth ‘
‘Why not in this birth itself?’ I ask.
You look the other side and remove wax from your ear!
So, no meaning in arguing with you. I should sleep.
‘Death’s choice is between strong and weak,’ I said earlier.
My term ‘weak’ here includes, not only the withered, aged, deteriorated, deformed, deprived people, but also, those who failed to discover their disease or didn’t discover it in time,
those who were wrongly diagnosed or got wrong treatment and those who made mistakes due to ignorance, negligence, for want of supports, financial, personnel, social, etc.
These ‘weak’ people are easy prey for ‘Death’. Whether you are a good man or a rotten rogue, if you escape from falling into the ‘weak’ category, you can pull on for sometime.
Is ‘Death’ a monster or a predator to pounce on the weak and feast on them? If I say, ‘yes’, I’m dragging the mythological ‘yama’ or ‘Kala’ riding on a water buffalo and roaming around the world with a rope to hook and drag people to his kingdom. I can’t do that. So, let me arrive at the conclusion that, by taking care of my body, there is every possibility of prolonging my death. Accidents are accidents and therefore not under my preview.
I repeat, I don’t bring into the field the Supernatural powers, who may or may not have any say in deciding when I should die.
That is too big a subject for me to handle and this is the wrong hour. Let us talk about that when I’m afresh after a morning bath.
So, let me think only about the present moment and sleep like a child.
‘Wait a minute, please,’ I hear your voice clearly, ‘what about the role of God? You proclaim every other minute, ‘ He decides’ . Where is He in your picture?’
Now, it is my turn to look at the other side and remove wax from my ear.
We outsource almost everything almost everything, including God-worship a purely personal affair between man and his creator.
The Chettiar in my corner shop does pooja on Saturday evenings through an ‘Iyer’, on payment. A couple in the neighborhood, extremely busy with their medical career, gets the pooja in their home, done through a Pandit, just as they entrust the care of their baby, while in their work, with a baby sitter.
Dasharath Maharaja and several other Rajas, performed Yagams through learned scholars and Rishies and the gods were satisfied.
You can outsource, almost everything but not your pains, mental and physical. In old age, the possibilities are the pain level increases and the tolerance level decreases.
So, everyone should get trained from the young days to face pain.
Richness, affluence, scholarship, merits, rewards
– all those attributes stand helpless before pain.
Do not curse pain; get habituated if you can’t get over it.
Madam, can you come out of the kitchen, for a moment, please ? Thank you.
Now, there is a small problem, for you, not for me.
Your body is different from that of your beloved husband and you chummy children. You don’t need a scholar like me to reveal this truth. Not withstanding your passionate love, care and compassion for them, their unstained affection, and anxiety to help you, the simple fact is, that your own circulatory system has to nourish your body parts and not theirs.
Your husband and grown up children are busy in their own ways and it is you, you and you alone can take care of your health. They might not be even available to call for an ambulance to take you to the hospital, though once you have reached there, they will shower money and attention.
So, madam, I strongly suggest, go for a medical check up, without waiting for your beloved hubby or benevolent children.
The machinery is yours. Give it at least as much importance of your coffee grinder or hair dryer. To use a hair dryer, you need hairs and for that you need a head. Simple truth, madam . You have to take care of your head, and only you can do it as it is your head. And head needs a body to stay and your head will stay only on your body. So the body is also important.
I have to come all the way and tell you this because, I know the fate of many housewives who took care of everyone in the family except themselves. None of them alive now to vouch for my statement. Sad indeed.
Shall I call a taxi for you to go for a medical check up? Who knows some blood sucking Yakshee is not hiding in your sari folds?
The first lesson a retiree should remember is his children have not retired from service along with him and he should not therefore, encroach on their time.
The second lesson is he has retired and he is the master of his time.
The third lesson is as he is the master of his time, he should use it scrupulously .
The forth one is he took retirement not for sleeping.
The fifth one is he should wash his plates and clothes and spread his own bed at night and roll it in the morning.
Twenty years after retirement, I’m learning these lessons !
Enjoy your day, if it is day for you there and enjoy the night if it is night for you there.
You never know when you have to walk alone
So, try to slowly loosen your attachments.
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Ananya, my grand daughter(9), had a noble thought on the eve of her cousins’ return after the holidays and immediately she called for a meeting of other kids ( 6 – 10) and organized a fund raiser for orphanage, in our basement, last night. She opened a counter with a card board box with an arch cut-opening for fortune telling. Ask a question on your future . The reply instantly written on a piece of paper, comes out through the counter. I asked 5 questions and got instant replies, and at the end a bill for five dollars! Divyaa opened a head massage and hair fashioning counter. The two boys, Raaghuv and Nikhil, had a counter for palm paintings. At the end, snacks were served. The session lasted an hour as we, four elders to be served. The service was of top quality.
Their very thinking and initiative were admiring . What I liked most was their initial investment of 45$ from their Own money, so that we won’t hesitate to shell out from our pocket.
A cheque in the name of the orphanage was drawn, including their earning for the evening plus their own contribution.
The little Dhruv is too small to join them. He was crawling around, enjoying the fun.
Let noble thoughts come to us from all sides, including from kids.
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Clay is good for making pots but never a castle. That doesn’t mean that clay and pots have no value or importance.
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Aspiration is not bad as long as it is not for another one’s belongings.
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If your scriptures, Babas and religious heads ask you to control your anger, they do it with good intention. But in practice, it is not that easy. You will continue to shout at your husband if he, in the busy morning hours, adds a spoon of sambar powder to rasam and coffee powder to sambar. Anger, in some form or other is bound to come out in the form of shouts. In a way it is good as otherwise you will unleash your fury on your colleagues or subordinates or children. Husbands are easily accessible; they are tolerant.
For husbands it is not a problem. They will take take a shower after their chorus to cool off before going to office.
I’m not a Baba or Guru. I talk practically.
Continue shouting at your husbands. For generation, their seniors were doing it at their wives. for no reason. ‘No reason’ I said as there is no record to show that any wife had added coffee powder to sambar, any time in history. I repeat i talk practically.
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Pushing you up or pulling you down- it is your mind first, then only others, money, circumstances, people etc.
So, if you are able to bring your mind under your control, no adversity can affect your equilibrium adversely. Use whatever tools you want, but make an attempt. I’m sure you will win, if not immediately, later when you grow further.
All need some balance
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Running helps in a competition or to catch a thief or a train or to trim you body muscles.
But in life as a whole, after running all the way and when you reach the end of the road, you should not feel that all that speed was unnecessary. Many of us run. Nowadays, running starts soon after you learn walking, right from your LKG days to the NRG ( no- return gate). In the olden days, the elders used to walk, long distance but not run. In between, they used to sit and chew a pan roll . You know pan rolls are ideal relaxers. I remember the leisurely way, my father, otherwise a busy man, used to take his own time to enjoy hIs frequent pan chewing.
So, walk and run only if absolutely essential. But come what may, stop for a while to enjoy a cup of chai, hot tea from the roadside Nair shop or to buy an arm length of jasmine flower garland for your wife or a toy for your children awaiting for your arrival. And reach home in time to spend some good time with your family.
Then, at the end of the road, you won’t be disappointed.
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Inserting both the hands into his pant pockets, raising his head proudly, looking deeply into the eyes of the young man who had come for the interview, the CEO majestically questioned, “what plan,what stuff, what material, what idea, ideas you have to double my earnings in two months, if you are appointed in my company. Give me your answer in two words”
The job-seeker calmly replied,”first, appoint”
The CEO, was a smart man, “I appoint you from today, but for only a day”, he roared, pride protruding at each word, “come on, give me your plan and execute”
“You quit; I will run the show”