Category: A12.01 About me, my family & friends

Unmayai chonna othukkanam- you should admit when I speak the truth-

2016 will be out soon. What happens next? The new Mathrubhoomi calendar will replace the old one! Everything else in the house, including me and my thammudu, will be the same!
For our age, the status quo condition is satisfactory ++++

Still, human nature being what it is, I turn back to look at the year vanishing behind the curtain. I’m too small a person to talk about the country but am big enough to talk about me. And talking I like; do let me.

With all the problems, the current year, in general, is closing with a good tune.

First and foremost, I am alive. Some of my relatives and friends are not. Even my own case was jerky for a while.

My brother who had serious health problem is much better now. Nandur uncle was kind enough to fit a machine to his ear, today. It should help to improve my kandasudhi, voice clarity..

Aparna, my daughter,  continues to like me despite my boring her with my songs for her clearance.

Megh, Anja, Hamsa and other mattupons and all others in the family too continue to like me, despite my doing things  which they don’t like!

Despite my disability lasting more than six months, could sing and upload more than 40 songs in the YouTube and over a hundred postings in my blog. Five thousand visitors this year for my blog, as per the WordPress record.

Earned a number of new Facebook friends; some have become intimate.

Could learn the elementary lessons in cooking. Another feather on my cap, for late learnings. Keep it up, good boy!

Last but not of least importance is that my aaharam( food intake) malamoothra visarjanam ( waste disposal from the body), swasotchwasam ( breathing), nidra ( sleep) are all normal when the year closes its annual account.

‘Is it such an important thing to report?’

Yes sir. It is! During the first part of this year, I was struggling for all those normal functions.

What do I look forward in the new year?

When I go back to USA, my grandchildren will look taller and four more kids will call me for the first time, ‘Appu thatha’, thanks to Shriram – Mahima and Suresh-Anusha!

And Dhruvu, Sidhu, Shreya, Vibha will call me with better clarity,
using full force for ‘pu’ in ‘appu’ and for ‘tha’ in ‘thAtha!’

I will be on cloud nine!

 

Time flies in jet speed or in mind’s speed. The shy and stylish girl, whom I brought to Hyderabad, soon after her graduation at GVC, for joining NIN, is a happy grand mother of six children now with the latest arrival of Rishi Skanda.

My Meenasister was fashionable right from her schooldays, not very common among the girls of her age those days. Soon after landing at Panchavadi, which was a bachelors’ palace till her arrival, she wanted me to buy a mirror table . Then came one after the other , coats, cupboards, dining table, chairs etc. The furnitures I have in Anantha Jyothy now were bought on her demand, long ago.

Being also my neighbor and colleague for nearly three decades, though younger to me by over twelve years, she has better understanding about my moods and pluses and minuses in behavior and therefore her grip on me is more stringent than my other sisters’ , a fact acknowledged by my daughters in law and used against me to discipline me! They threaten me when the hope of correcting me is lost,
‘Meenthaikittae chollanamo?- should we tell Meenathai?’.

We have toured together many places within India while in service and many places outside the country too after retirement.

She is so meticulous about her life style maintenance and mine too. For me, any button hole is meant for any button, not so for her!
While doing pradakshinam in the Guruvayoor temple, she noticed the non alignment of my veshti- ends and asked me to rectify it.
I was annoyed.
‘You are here to enjoy Unnikannan’s Devine form and not to see the alignment of my dothi ends,’ I chided her, ‘look at the sanctum, not at me’.

She likes music but not my singing. She likes to read stories but not my Ammalu stories. But she likes me at times. And more she likes, more sharp will be her observation of my movements and habits.

Her hubby who was a pillar of support for me during my difficult days is reborn as a grand child with his birth-star. I’m told that the new born is named as Rishi Skanda, Skanda representing the grandpa’s name Subramanian.

I wish Skantha long life with good Heath, good character and Good luck. And for his parents excellent health and lot of patience. To take care of four children, three of them babies is going to be undoubtedly a sweet but also a tough job.

‘Mamaji, of your mattupons, I’m the only one who has followed your footsteps ( in having three sons and a daughter) , claimed proudly Skantha’s mom. Yes, Mahima that is why other mattupons rightly say that you’re my ‘chellamattupon’.

In the pictures from my album, Meenasister at Panchavady.

 

After my BSc, I started my career in a field survey under a WHO project and our unit was at Trichur. My job was to collect blood, urine and feces samples from the farmers and other workers in the remote villages where malnutrition was prevalent, by early morning visits, exam those at our Laboratory at Poonkunnam and submit the report to the head of our unit. Being surrounded by many such samples as a routine, my childhood hatred for urine and feces evaporated and I realized how important are our discharges. But, generally, our concentration is on what we intake and we take for granted the wastage elimination system of the body. The purifying and waste eliminating machines are as important as our blood pumping machine. Urine and stool examinations are a must in the primary detection of certain diseases. When my Hb level was going down , there was a worry whether there was any internal leakage of blood and I had to get the stool examination for occult blood many times.

Our exit gate is not getting as much attention as our inner gate.

Don’t take anything for granted including your urinary habits and stool motion.

Don’t take anyone for granted, your baby, your boss in the work or at home.

Your baby can pee at your face, your boss can call you when you are on the way for an emergent pee and your wife can go for a pee after serving you idlies with no water bottle, anywhere in the vicinity.

——————-

When I landed at our Hyderabad home, back from USA, there was none even to talk to, as my brother was bedridden. Now I have in him a helping hand too. There should be at least two in a house. Similarly, I feel there should be two children to grow together.

Two is a company, not a crowd.

Two is a pair and it is fair if they are of different sex.

Two is a festival, if they are husband and wife, with understanding of each other.

Two is a ferry trip in cyclone if they don’t adjust and understand each other’s feelings.

 

Having led a life of leisure, luxury, laziness and lethargy for over three years with my children in USA, my sudden active life now is really interesting. I like it. I learn many new dishes. Vicha wanted Roti for dinner. Came up well, especially the potato curry, thanks to Aparna’s guidance.

When Vicha says, ‘Anna, pasikkarathu- I’m hungry’, I see the picture of a kid crying for mother’s milk. For a moment, I see myself elevated to the seat of MAta Annapurneswari, ready to serve food for all. Being an insulin- dependent diabetic, his system craves for food every two hours. And I have to be ready with my dishes to feed him, as he likes good food and enjoys eating.

My wife had always satisfaction on her face. Now, I know the reason. She was cooking and feeding us! I was not helping her in her routine duties not even pressing and folding my washed clothes. Now, everything I have to do myself. Busy through out.
Happy as I’m busy, happy as I’m of some use to my brother. Happy I’m not wasting my time.

Oh, that exactly is the reason why gods smile, all gods invariably, unless they are on the way to kill demons.

God’s won’t smile while going to kill; some men do.

You would have observed that everyone returns with a few Gangagel pots and Annapurneswari idols from Kasi, not idols of Baba Biswanath ( Viswanayptha swamy, Visalakshi or Kalabhairavaswamy) reason is simple- every one’s priority is Annam and Jalam, food and water!

The Annapurneswari idols are amazing. The Devine Mother, holding a vessel and spoon in her hands , ready to serve food. I have quite a few of them. And Sankaracharya’s Annapurneswari stotram too is Devine. The very start itself is superb- ‘NithyAnanda karee!’
Perennial aanandam- Mother gives that. Everything has a date of expiry. Even aanandam too . But Annapurneswari gives aanandam everyday. It comes from the food she serves. Food is the base for all our happiness. Food is Devine. ‘Annam Brahma ‘, says Vedam.

But Samkracharya is not seeking food for hunger. His request is for food for ‘jnAnana vairaghya sidhi’ jnAnam is absolute awareness of the absolute and vairaghyam is asceticism, freedom from all worldly desires. So when I see the array of Annapurneswari idols in my pooja, I should remember not idly, sambar but the need of learning the supreme knowledge. And what we bring back from Kashi is not roti, paani, but real knowledge for Devine aspiration, That is the real food. .
But to survive, we need food. That was why Vedas said, ‘Annam Brahma’. But ultimate ‘annam’ is brahmajnAnam.

September 28 th is a memorable day for me as my eldest son Ananth ( Sharath/ Kuttan for me ) was born on that day, over forty years ago.
Those moments the parents wait to have a first look at the face of the first child ( or the faces of the subsequent children) are always packed with unalloyed joy and anxiety and so many other feelings which can’t be explained in words. In the case of my wife and myself, not the moments but the months we waited to see our first baby was explainable in words- we simply wanted to have a normal child! . We had no other ambition. Reason- we feared, threatened by a gynecologist friend, that there was a possibility that the child might not be a normal one, consequent to the effect of certain medicines, my wife was taking during pregnancy.

‘Come what may, we will have the baby’, decided we both, despite discouraging suggestions and advices from some medical friends we were surrounded with, then. And that was the best decision we took in our life. And the happiest moment in our life was when on child birth, the pediatrician certified that the baby was perfectly normal.

Sharath, like his mom and unlike his dad, is a man of a few words, good, intelligent, meaningful, timely and apt. He likes, again like his mom, the best of everything and there can’t be a better example for that than Megh, his life partner. ( you may like to add that his mom’s selection of me proves my point!😌) He resembles his paternal grand father, whose name he bears, in looking after his parents and I can never forget the affection and care I received from him and Megh, when I fell seriously ill last year.
I wish my Kuttan a long life along with his wife and children and the best of it, as he always opts for the best.

Happy birthday Sharath.

 

 

 

 

All children are god’s gifts for their parents but I was more so as I was a Bagavath prasAdam, god’s blessings to my mother’s soul-full prayers after she lost her seemanthaputran, first child hardly one year old, who bore our ancestral name for the eldest child of the family, Vancheeswaran. The tsunami of small pox which swept Palakkad during those days, snatched the child as well as her one eye, though it spared the life of my father, luckily for her, for me and my siblings and also for our grandmother. My mother too would have become a prey to the fearsome virus but for the day and night vigil of her mother in law, Ammalu, my paternal grand mother, a very kind and capable woman and that debt was paid back to her by my father by caring her in her old age, like his own eyeball.

‘I have observed ‘Shasti vratham’ during the entire period I carried you and I’m confident that you won’t go the wrong way, now or ever’ – those words of my mother has been my safety belt throughout my life.

I feel guilty for not paying back to my mother at least a portion of the affection and care she showered on me, as like my sisters who left home during their early twenties, I too left home and subsequently my parents stayed with me only on a few occasions. I was lucky to be with my father to take care of him during his last days and also do the last rites but in my mother’s case, I could reach home only after her cremation was offer. The destiny allotted that duty and fortune to my brother, Vicha.
Is the task if attending him now allotted to me, just to clear a portion of my old debts to my mom?

The work allotment and wage payments are made by the Master strictly as per our deserving. Have no doubt on that.

You will get what you are due to.

The story of an umbrella and a stick.

My father used to say that in our families, women live longer than men. An exception was my wife and fortunately for him, he preceded her.

There has to be a scientific basis for every happening unless the celestial masters opt to intervene in human affairs. Now, I discovered the reason for the longevity of women in my family- they were all housewives!

How do house wives live longer. They are active always, physically and mentally. Their brain is alert and limbs on motion throughout their waking life!

Yes, during my short tenure as ‘house keeper’, I have found that
a house wive does maximum physical and mental exercise as a matter of routine, as necessitated by her job. See my case. I don’t go to Gym nowadays and there is no need for that as I shuttle a hundred times between hall, kitchen, verandas, portico and backyard and font gate of my house.

Why to the front gate? To buy vegetables, raw maize and many other items after bargaining from the vendors who come to our gate to sell. Time has to be set aside to chat with the neighbors who come out of their houses seeing my face, as if they were waiting from the morning for me to come out for discussing on various issues, some of them of extreme importance.

Now coming to the mental exercise. See how active and alert my mind has to be.

The servant woman, YAdamma, switches on the lights and fans in all rooms before sweeping the floors and swabbing and despite repeated instructions, doesn’t put those off when the need is over. So, I keep a watch peeping into all the rooms. Suddenly, I remember that I forgot to switch off the stove which I should have done ten minutes before. I rush to the kitchen. The water kept for heating had already transformed into vapors and the bottom of the vessel had started turning black. The servant asks, ‘eami Saar, maritchupoyAra?- you forgot?’ That was her way of teasing me for blaming her for not switching off the lights and fans!

My brain starts working. How to pay back this old woman in the same coin?
Vicha Anna asks, ‘Anna Chukku vellam is not ready yet?’

‘Vicha, your water has gone up!’ I tell him .

‘When did water started going up?’ He asks to tease, ‘water finds its way to go down!’

No time to argue with him. I keep another vessel full of water when driver Ali asks for an umbrella. I tell him that I have only one umbrella and I need it. ‘Then, how will go I back home, Sir?’, he asks as if it was written in my employment offer that I should provide him with an umbrella or rain coat when it rains.

‘Don’t go’. I tell him in anger.

‘Teekey, Saheb, chai banavo’ – ‘ok, make tea for me’.

‘Naaku kooda chaya kAvAli Sir’ I too want tea, says Yadamma, the servant woman.

‘Didn’t Lakshmi give you?’ I ask her. Lakshmi, our cook, has gone back after finishing her morning duty.

‘She gave, but a cat came, tilted the tumbler’

‘I let out the cat to tilt your tea tumbler?’, I ask her.

I go in search of the cat in each and every corner and in that process, locate an umbrella behind the built in cupboard.

‘When did I buy this umbrella?’ I ask myself. To the best of my knowledge I haven’t spent a pie to buy an umbrella or a rain coat or a hat.

‘Could it be my KasiyAtra umbrella? There was a stick too which Amman, my father in law presented to me during my wedding, Where is that? I search for the stick in every nook and corner and Yadamma reminds that the water kept for Vicha had again gone as vapor.

‘Chukku vellam ready Atcha, Anna?’ He enquires.

‘The water has gone up again,’ comments YAdamma.

‘Saheb, chatri hena aapka hatmae?’, – there is an umbrella in your hand!’, teases Ali.

‘But where is the stick?’ , I ask him.

‘What stick?’, he asks in bewilderment.

‘Sir is looking for a stick to chase cat,’ Comments Yadamma.

‘But, where is cat? It would have reached London now!’ Comments Ali.

I go almost mad! What else do you need to keep mind alert and active which, combined with physical movements, leads to longevity?

No, but that is not the end of the story. The stick which I was searching for is hanging from another corner! That makes me sad, very sad. The person who gifted the umbrella and stick and also many others who were present then, are no more. Even the girl for whose wedding those were gifted is no more, but the bloody umbrella and stick are still alive.

I have a good habit. I switch over from negative thoughts to positive thoughts quickly. I console myself: ‘ you think only about yourself. Your umbrella and stick are already dead and gone. The one you see now belongs to your son!’

Oh, those are great treasures to be preserved. I remove those, clean and hang in the original places!

‘Chatri – umbrella!’ Ali asks

Yadamma asks for stick to chase the cat.

No, I don’t give them. I keep those in a safe place.

‘Oh, ‘great!’ ‘amazing!’, ‘enjoy!’, ‘ what a relief, Appa!’ etc.  were their comments in excitement when I told my children in USA that Meenasister’s cook Laksmi has reported for duty yesterday. Why a cook for two people and what is so exciting about it? God knows, perhaps, other than my children!

But there were more exciting things in the offing.

Lakshmi, completed her work in an hour and went home.

‘Anna, Chuukku vellam!’ Vicha , my younger brother, was waiting for her to leave, to give me the order!

He drinks only hot water or medicated hot water.

I gave him a real boiling water – like look and entered the kitchen.

No, the burner won’t work. Gas cylinder was new and so was the lighter. Then, why it can’t work?

‘Radha!’, I yelled. She is my tenant occupying a room in the mezzanine floor. ‘Come soon, urgent!’ . I demanded.

‘I’m in the bath room uncle,’ she replied.

‘Great!’, I replied.

‘What is great to be in the bath room?’, she asked.

After five minutes, I called her again. ‘Raaaaadha! Over?’

‘No uncle. Still in the bath room’

”Amazing!’ I replied.

‘What is amazing to be in the bathroom, uncle?’ . Another valid question.

‘Anna chukkuvellam,’ Vicha repeated his demand.

‘Nee thalakkaya! Your head, I scolded him.
‘Vicha, I’m not able to switch on the stove.
There seems to be some major problem. Your Chukku vellam has to wait, till the mechanic comes and repairs the gas or stove or the lighter’

His hearing capacity is not as bad as I expected.
He responded.’ Have you unlocked the cylinder. There is a knob on the regulator, which you have to turn on’

I did that. The flame appeared.

‘Great’ – I didn’t say.

‘Amazing!’ No, I didn’t say.

Radha came running from the bathroom and saw the burner on.

‘Uncle amazing!’ She was excited.

‘ you are great!’ She acclaimed my skill.
I’m Radha, I’m . I admitted humbly. Who won’t feel proud to be called ‘great!’

‘Anna Chukku vellam!’ The chukkuvellam master won’t leave me.

‘Yes, Sir. Ready. Fill all your flasks and don’t repeat your demand till tomorrow morning’

That useless guy neither said, great, or amazing or wonderful.

‘Oh, romba chudarathu- very hot’ – was his only response.
Practical man. His response was correct.

But, it lacked charm, poetry, amazement, joy!

Love,
SP
Sent from my iPad

Sometime ago my son Sharath said that he was applying for a Permanent Resident status also called, ‘Green Card’, for me so that my stay in USA won’t be restricted to six months, as permissible in the normal course. Only condition is, I should stay here for a minimum period of 181 days every time I visit this country.

The documents needed for applying for the Green Card included my birth certificate and marriage certificate. I had neither.

It was a fact that I was born but why should the Federal Government believe that it happened, when my own office doesn’t release my pension, unless someone certifies once a year, that I’m alive ? Governments work on papers.

For every problem there is a solution. The rule says: If no birth certificate, procure a certificate from the Municipal Office of birthplace that they had searched and found that the birth was not registered in their records. For that, a relative born prior to me, had to certify that I was born in a particular place in my case, Kalpathy. In my known circle of relatives or close friends, none senior to me could be located and those available were All born after I was born!

‘Appu anna, Ponnai akkal’, jumped from his seat my cousin Prasad as if he was sanctioned an increment in pay, ten years after retirement! Ponnai akkal, by her own good acts and also by the praiseworthy acts of her father and husband who were teachers at Alathur and Koduvayoor High Schools respectively, touch wood, is doing well at 85. Thanks to her grand daughter who is my FB friend, I could talk to her last month.

Once that letter was obtained, it was child’s play for Siddappa, my friend for whom the Municipal office was ‘ammayeeda adukkala- mother in law’s kitchen’

‘Appu, poi oru idiaapavum chaayayayum kazitcho – you can relax and have some tea and snacks’, he said.

I got the green card within one year.

During the first three years, I could not strictly follow the rule with regard to the minimum stay in USA. Once, I stayed for less than six months in USA and once I returned after seven months’ stay in India. The immigration officer on my entry, made a note of it in my passport. Third year onwards, however, my stay was continuous.

When the minimum five years period with green card was over,
Whether to apply for citizenship or not, was a big question, as I mentioned earlier.

‘Ninnilthannae pirakkaavu jnAn oru
Pullaienkilum en MalanAdae!’

My dear land of hills, I should be reborn only in your lap, at least as a grass blade!

Those lines are from my poem in the college magazine. So deep was my love for my country from my early days, How will I forsake my janbhoomi and karmabhoomi and opt to a country in the fag end of my life? But, my children and grand children live here! That settled the issue. ‘No more discussion on this issue dad’, said my children.

I learned the one hundred questions and answers related to the country’s history as prescribed and available in the web, as required for the ‘Naturalization’ or citizenship.

continues