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Ammalu is always right

“Ammalu, I have a humble request to you. When some respectable people like me come to our house to see me, please get up as a way of respect to me and keep standing till they quit”
“Yes, but there is a small problem. once I stand up I won’t be able to stay in that position, for more than a minute. If you can keep supporting me from my back, till your respectable guest quits, the job is done ”
“Ammalu, don’t go to our backyard at night. If you want curry leaves pluck before sunset”
“You are worried for me as someone said there is a bootham in our drumstick tree?”
“I’m worried for the bootham”
“SP, the drumstick tree- bootham is a Sisu ( baby ) compared to the one I caught and am controlling. So, don’t worry about me ”
“Ammalu, this girl Ammini is jealous of me”
“Which girl? Our Ravunni Nair’s daughter?”
“No, Ammalu, our Ammini, my former colleague”
“I’m afraid your age is showing up. The Ammini, you mentioned now is not a girl, she is a muthi , a grandmother like me. She is not our Ammini. She is our friend Nair’s. She is jealous of me, not you, for being the wife of a honest man like you. Understood?”
“Yes, I did. But, I’m sorry you didn’t understand why I said, ‘ our Ammini’. I’m a sanyasi and the whole world belongs to me”
“Wrong. You are not a sanyasi and only me belongs to you, not the whole world”
“You are my world, Ammalu. You are my whole world. Understood?”
“Yes, I did”
“What did you understand?”
“I’m a world and in that world, there is no place for your Ammini or Kummini?”
“Who is this new character, Kummini?”
“Someone whom you will claim as yours, tomorrow”
Wonder, how his Highness accepted you Asthana Vidwan! What qualification do you have to become a courtier ?”
“Ammalu, the first question the Highness asked me was,’ are you a singer?’
I replied, ‘I sing, but not a singer’
The next question was, ‘are you a poet?’
I replied, ‘I write poems but not a poet’
The minister signaled me to quietly quit but the king asked me, ‘With what merit are you here, to claim a seat in this royal court?’
I replied, ‘your most exalted highness, I’m Ammalu’s husband for over five decades’.
‘No more questions’, said the king and turning to the minister, ordered, ‘Appoint him as our Asthana Vidwan, before some other King grabs this great man, who is carrying out the most difficult job in the world”
“Good that I didn’t come there. The king would have gifted me half his kingdom for living as your wife all these years and you would have been deprived of a coveted position”
“Ammalu, I grew so tall not because of your mother’s bottle -feed; you may tell her if you please”
“Sorry, I can’t. She knows that it is my bottle feed behind your height and weight”
“SP, your friends have better works to do than reading what you write.
unlike you, they have to take care of their family, help their wife in household duties, bathe their children and take them to school etc”
“What else do they learn from my posts? I translate my practical experience into words. I serve my wife as a sincere unpaid worker and she knows that”
“Oh, my God! So, there is another ‘she’ in your life?”
“Pity your brain hasn’t grown a millimeter since our marriage, Ammalu”
“Hairs grow, nails grow. Does brain also grow? If I may recapitulate your memory to the high school science lesson, SP Sir, brain grows only during the first few years after birth. When I was two years old about 80% of my brain growth was complete. And when I married you at 12, there was no scope for further growth at all”
“But, your tongue grew enormously?”
“Sheer necessity, to control your abnormal brain growth. Nature always provides some checks and breaks”
“When I open my eyes, I see you as a lotus, fully blossomed, floating in the lake of my heart.
When I close my eyes, Ammalu, I see you as a crocodile rushing into the river of my heart”
“Lake, first. Then river. The water accumulation in your heart is increasing. Let us consult our physician immediately, before it swells into a sea. Too much water in the body, is too bad, at your age.
And it is imperative you should be able to see me as your wife and not as a flower or an animal”

1 thought on “Ammalu is always right

  1. I am reading your blog with tears in my eyes.
    ‘When I close my eyes, Ammalu, I see you as a crocodile rushing into the river of my heart”. Adi Sankara’s crocodile- it could grant him our desire- for his material needs were our spiritual needs- but never prevent him returning to conduct his mother’s obsequies.
    For this reason, Lord Krishna says he is crocodile among fishes and Ganga among rivers.
    What a charming blog! I would like to publish some parts of it as books.

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