Ammalu is always right

 
 
 
 
‘How many times haven’t I told you Ammalu, that I don’t like needles?’
‘Not needles, noodles. This is for my mom’
‘That old fashioned bird wants to peck a new fashion food, the needles?’
‘Don’t unnecessarily needle me about noodles. These are noodles and not needles’
‘An Appa Iyer School third stand -thrown out, is questioning my
Oxford English ?’
‘No meaning in arguing with you, SP. The one who doesn’t know the difference between his own wife and another man’s wife will never understand the difference between needles and noodles’
‘Ammalu, dear, hurry up. Amma, our Amma, will be waiting’
‘Our Amma?’
‘She is my Amma first; then only yours. She will be waiting for –‘
‘Needles!’
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‘I can’t wait for hours before the dining table. Choose one plate, either Parippu vada or uzunthu vada. Any one plate’
‘Ammalu , Parippu vada is crisp, gives fun while biting. Let me say it is like a girl friend. Uzunthu vada, is so, so. Soft, not sportive. Let me say, it is like a wife. Give me some time to decide which to choose’
‘Let me say, you deserve neither wife nor girl friend. I’m removing both the plates
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Ammalu, in the olden days, wives used to address their husbands, respectfully, as ‘naathaa!’, ‘aaryaa!’ etc. lovers now address each other as ‘baby’. I’m just mentioning casually’
‘We are not in the olden days and so, I can’t address you as you casually mentioned. I can call you ‘baby’, if you like. Get me a feeding bottle, please. It is available in our Chettiar shop’
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Ammalu, when I married you 4 years ago, you were like a priceless, fresh, fragrant flower. Now, I miss something in you’
‘You are, for me, still a priceless fresh, fragrant flower. I miss nothing in you now but a zero from your memory. And they say zero has no value’
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‘Ammalu, you know that I can talk  seven languages, four indian and three foreign. Call me for assistance when your friends come for Navarathry Kolu. I will be in the side room’
‘All my friends know the language which I know and which you do not know. You may therefore enjoy fresh breeze under the corner banyan tree. I will send word for you after the womenfolk disperse
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