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Ammalu is always right

“Go ahead, no objection if you want go out and enjoy Onam feast with your your friends. Only one condition: On your return, don’t give a lecture on the length and colour of their sari, or shape of the pappadams , they served. I have seen their saris, I know the length and colour. I know the shape of the pappadams too. We bought pappadams together from the same shop”
“I like people to be free, frank, open, like me.
Be open my wife. Tell me, If you don’t like me. Tell others if you like me”

Am I a wife or tea – taster?”
“I’m really lucky to have you as my wife, Ammalu. You know, why?”

“If not me, who else will know that?”
“Once a while, I enjoy the peace and liberty of your absence, Ammalu”

“Sharing the absence. A tonic it is for every married couple”.
“Once, just once, I want to hear you calling me,
‘PrAnanAthA’, as epic heroines used to address their husbands. I’m prepared to do any service to you for that favour”

“Why once ? I will call you so from morning to evening. At home, in the temple, in marriage halls, in children’s home, in America, in Canada, wherever we go together”

“Let us drop the idea, Ammalu. Your yelling behind me, holding a fry pan, screaming ‘PrAnanAtha’, is unimaginable, even when I’m within the four walls of the house”

“But, PrAnAthA, I can drop the fry pan and call you”

” Stupid woman, be serious. If you call me so once more I will throw you into the Kalpathy River”

“Once more, just once more?”

“Ammalu, a female lion is lioness and a female tiger is tigress . As the president of the Humbled Husbands’ Association I protest the additional two ‘ss’ for the female folks”

“Tigers and lions being proud husbands like you, will hesitate to say, ‘yes,yes’ to what their women folks say. So, the wise grammarians added that sound to satisfy the weakened wives’ ego.
I expected you to know this as an authority in English”
“Two people live in a house and both were fighting like wild animals. Worried what would have happened now”

“If both were men, they would have stopped the fight, the moment you left and went to the nearest cafe and sharing a half Chai. If they were women, they would be still fighting till hunger takes over.
If they were husband and wife, he would have fallen at her feet and be comfortable there till she wakes him up for food. No need to worry in any case”

“Ammalu, I’m not like other husbands. I’m a tiger among men. I will never fall at your feet”

” I know. The tiger only wags its tails”
“Whom do you like more, Ammalu, me or our little Dhruv?”

“You, of course. Dhruv is reasonable”

” A baby of just one year old is reasonable and not me!”

“Dhruv understands”

“Dhruv has all the attributes and me, nothing!
Then, why did you marry me? Ammalu?”

“That was why I married you and that is why I love you. Dhruv will flourish without my love whereas you need my support from dawn to dusk”

“Even my mother won’t say that”

“Exactly. So, don’t ask me why I like you more than I like little Dhruv”
“Don’t get angry, if by poor sight, I press elsewhere, in stead your legs, Ammalu”

“By poor sight, permitted ; not by oversight”


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