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Ammalu is always right – contd

“You are blooming. What is the matter? Did Ammini say that you are the most eligible bachelor in the world ?”
“She was about to say that but had a choke in the throat. She simply said that I am the best husband”
“That idiot should say that to her husband and NOT to MY husband”
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“Why that mischievous smile?”
“Imagining how your face will look if you wear jeans and T shirt”
” Imagine how YOUR face will look”
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“Have we met somewhere, madam? Your face seems to be very familiar”
“Man, I am your wife for 30 long years and what is wrong with you today. Who has cast an evil-eye on myhusband?”
”I am so sorry, Ammalu. My eye sight is failing  briskly, don’t know why”” That is a cause for concern. Do one thing; sign all these cheques. Who knows
tomorrow, it might further deteriorate”” But how do I sign when my eyes could not recognize my dear wife of 30 years ?””No problem. Here is the stamp pad. You can affix your thumb impression”
“How do I find my thumb”
”Don’t worry;  I know where your thumb is”
“Hei, wait a minute. Who placed Ammini’s photo in my cheque book”
“Who said that is Ammin’s photo? It is my photo”
“You think I am blind Ammalu ? ”
”So, you are sure it is Ammini’s photo and not mine?”
” I am, I am, I am”
”OK. Give back the cheque books. I need not worry about your eyesight for another 10 years.
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“Ammalu, why don’t we sit calmly in a place and discuss about the ways to have more peace, more happiness, more—“
“Look, I don’t think we need anything more now; in fact we need something less- your talk and nagging me for small, small requirement of yours soap, bath towel etc so that I can attend to more important work”‘
“You already have enough of ‘mores’; why again ‘more’ for you?”
“I simply love your such talks, more and more”

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” on one hand , just on one hand, if I tattoo, how will I look, Ammalu?’
” On my back, just only on my back, if I tattoo and wear a back-opened blouse, how will I look?”” Have you gone mad?'” Move a bit please; let me tattoo the floor and front doors first for the Janmashtami festival, before I turn to tattoo your hands or legs”
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” Whenever I talk about Ammini or Sundari, why are you looking at the ceiling
or floor ? Why don’t you look straight at my face?”
“Wherever I turn, up, sides or down, I see nothing but your charming face and sparkling eyes,  Ammalu”
“Oh, man ! what an enchanting eloquence! what an enviable escape route!”
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” I have a feeling that in this house, my silence and soft-talks are mistaken for my weakness. If you don’t know the meaning of my words, Ammalu, refer to Oxford Dictionary ”
” Only you and me are there, in this house. So, I have a feeling that your complaint is against me. Anyway get ready. Let us go”
”Where to ?”
“To get a thicker lens as the present one is too weak for you. It was a mistake, last time, we went for the cheaper ‘Si’ lens. We should also try to get some hard discs which will convert  your soft talks to harder ones”.
“Ammalu, you make me go crazy”
“What else a wife is for?”
” Oh, my God, you don’t need a Dictionary; you  can write a dozen. I used  the word ‘crazy’ in its simplest form. I can’t afford to go crazy at this age; and you too, I presume.”
“I have a feeling in this house—“”
“Ammalu, please don’t have any feelings. As you correctly said, you and me are alone in this house.”
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” I never knew that I was marrying an incompatible partner, Ammalu”
” I knew”
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” I’m a very honest husband. What say, Ammalu?”
” You are indeed a honest husband. And that is why I”m here.”
” Why did you remove that adjective? A miser you are.”
“There are only two types; honest or dishonest. good or bad. I don’t see anything beyond that.”
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” Ammalu, sometimes I forget who I’m”
“Not a big problem”
“Sometimes, I forget who you are”
“Not a big problem there too. The real problem will come only if I forget who YOU are ”
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