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Ammalu is always right

“Ammalu, when the age mounts, memory slips down. So, in case I forget your name, don’t be angry with me. I may call you, Ammini, Paru, Parukutty or KalyAni, but please respond”
“Forget anything, call me by any name, I don’t mind. But never forget to hand over your monthly Pension to me so that I don’t forget to cook food for you”
“Cook for you and me. Right?”
“No, only for you”
“Then, what will I do?”
“You can go to Ammini or Kummini. Why should why worry about you?”
“They are only my friends”
“But you remember only their names and not mine”
“Ammalu, you are my wife!”
“How do I know? I don’t remember”
“How can you say that? You were sitting like a bee on an elephant’s head on your father’s lap when I tied the knot and immediately, your mother who was moving around with a bundle of currency notes in hand suddenly vanished. Do t you remember?’
“I don’t remember”
“Holding your hand I came out and showed you the Arundathy star in the sky when you quipped, ‘so, you have already started your lie serials with me? There is no star in the sky”
“That, I remember”
“Ammalu, I have my own status, power, position, name, fame. if you expect me to follow you like a calf behind cow, you are wrong’
“SP, be practical, old man! I can’t expect you to follow me like a bull”
“Ammalu, Will you be angry, if I say, ‘the friend and back of my girl friends are lovely?’
“Not at all. In fact, I will go a step further and say that all their external parts are lovely. I will go one more step and say that your external and internal parts including your heart are lovely. I’ll come back by a step (unwillingly, but unavoidably) and say that your eyes too are lovely but your spectacle needs correction”
“Ammalu, what was the senior 9- yards searching in my room early morning?”
“Might be her dentures, not sure.”
“Her dentures, why in my room?”
“It is just my assumption. Last night she was yelling at you, while you were talking to Pattu and her forceful voice would have catapulted her dentures to your room”
“Did she scream at me? I didn’t hear”
“Oh, you didn’t have your hearing aid on. I saw it in her room, this morning”
“But, how did my hearing aid reach S9Y ‘s room?”
“You were blinking at your friend’s face as if you were seeing her for the first time. So, I pinched your ear and in my force, your hearing aid would have catapulted to her room”
“Ammalu, was it not Pattabhi who sat opposite to me in the lunch table last night?”
“OMG, your spectacles too would have catapulted somewhere”
“Seems to be the season of catapulting!”
“Not unusual for your age. As long as you don’t catapult, I’m happy”
“Please don’t interfere in my affairs; I too won’t in yours. Did you hear me, Ammalu?”
“Yes, I should not interfere in your affairs but you will, in mine”
“Do you have a mind reading machine? Can you spare it for five minutes when your mom comes here?”
“I can. But remember, my mom has already one such instrument imbedded in her heart, instead of pacemaker by a qualified surgeon”
“Remember old lady, you are taking to a Para medico to consult whom leading surgeons were waiting in front of his house”
“When was that, Sir?”
“Some twenty years before, while I was in service”
“No telephones then? Why did they come personally? Recall your memory and confirm, please”
“I confirm what I said”
“Then, you had another house and another wife? I was not aware of that long Que at our gate”
“Ammalu, I never mentioned about a woman”
“But, you mentioned about a house. what is SP without women!”
Ammalu and her Progeny soothram
“Ammalu, my father, unlike me, was a very strict man. I had never seen my mother sitting before him. Always, she used to stand, out of respect, a few yards away from him”
“Always? It can’t be always; I’m sure”
“Always. I should know better than you”
“No dispute. But, why that topic now? Is it because I’m sitting while you’re standing?”
“I gave you maximum freedom to sit or stand, near or far, as you please”
“You regret for the liberty you gave me?”
“Not exactly, but–”
“If there is an iota of regret, remove it from your mind. You did correctly as per the Progeny soothram”
“Progeny soothram? I haven’t heard it before!”
“Being a Sanskrit scholar, you know Panini soothram. I’m sure. Progeny was Panini’s brother”
“Maharshi Panini had a brother?”
“step brother. According to his theory, if a husband allows his wife to stand or sit as she likes, she will gift him with four children, minimum, as I did”
“Otherwise ?”
“Only one child, as your mother did”
“I see. I never knew that. You can sit, stand or dance, as you please, Ammalu”
“But, Progeny soothram sets an age limit. We have crossed that”

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