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Ammalu is always right

“If Parukutty comes, tell her that the vessel she wanted, is on the kitchen table ”
“Sorry, Ammalu. I can’t do that. I have taken a vow not to look at the face of ‘aparastree’, any woman other than my wife”
“I know that. She will enter the house walking backward or you walk backward and pass on the message. But, make sure, that by mistake, you don’t collide. As you always comment, her face is pretty but her back is pretty hard”
Hi, dude! What’s up ?”
“Dude? Who is that?”
“Who else, pal? You, my Hubby the Honest”
“Ammalu, What happened to you old lady? We have just applied for American visa; you have already become an American ?”
“No, I haven’t and I won’t .
But tell me this- will you stop roaming in the temple premises, wearing shorts?”
“Yes, I’ll”
“Will you stop talking to my mom in English?”
“Yes, I’ll”
“Will you stop telling my friends that I’m old- fashioned and you are new- fashioned?”
“Ammalu, I never said that I’m new- fashioned!”
“You didn’t. That was my addition to extract the truth from you”
“Ha,ha! Too many additions to extract too many things!”
“SP, I’m a wife and I’m an Indian wife. I’m a Palakkadan wife. I know how to make you a good husband”
“Thank you. You called me SP and not dude. You said I’m your husband not hubby”
“No additions or extractions there, SP sir!”
“You talk as if I’m an Asura and you are a Deva breed, Ammalu”
“Never. You are not only a Deva, but you are their King, Devaraja. That comparison has nothing to do with Ahalya episode, though”
“Of all the women I know Ammalu, you are the best bet. I have realized it now”
“My dear SP, you have only seen other women but none of them you know. Even after living with me so long, you have not known me. So, forget about your bet”
“Aren’t you ashamed SP, to be after Ammalu, always, pestering her, holding the backdrop of her sari?”
“No, I’m not . Man has to be after a woman at any age. And at my age, do you think it would be safe for me to be after a woman other than my wife?’
“Ammalu, you are my wife, not WiFi, to appear and disappear, now and then”
“What to do SP, you note only my absence, not my presence”
“In the good old days, wives used to fall at the feet of their husbands thrice a day and take their blessings”
“Shall I fall at your feet now?”
“Wait till your mom comes, please. She is expected any moment. She will be happy to see the glow in my face”
“It is a good idea. She goes and tells everyone that I’m an expert in making you prostrate before me, thirty times a day( not thrice) , without your head bending an inch”
“That is a polished way of telling that I obey every word of yours”
“I have no idea. I w’ll fall at your feet the moment she comes in. I’ll”
“Ammalu, please don’t do that. From thirty per day, you mom will increase the number to three hundred”
“Ammalu, I’m a honest husband. you admit?”
“All husbands are honest, when their wives are around”
“I’m honest even when you are not with me. Admit?”
“That is an issue to be admitted by other women, not me”
“Every other women among our friends, has already endorsed my views”
“Then, why ask me?”
“They however said, let us talk on this topic, when Ammalu is around!”

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