Posted on 10 Comments

Result of love marriage

Posted by AVMV on the 4Brahmins Yahoo groups

Dear Cheenu and all friends,

Keeping in tune with our Cheenu’s light-hearted (yet profound) picturesque observation on ‘Kalarppu Kalyaanam’ (emphasis being on ‘Kalarppu’ and ‘progeny’) of the  ‘progenitors’ thereof, I wish to share a limerick (tongue-in-cheek verse for some!!…short, irreverent, often bawdy verses…for many) with oblique reference to natural ‘Laws’. The word “law” could also be applied to statements of observed fact of a rather different kind; for example, as a handy expression to sum up a general tendency, in cases where a given effect usually, though not
necessarily, follows a given cause. Thus the **Mendelian “law” of inheritance expresses the observed fact that the mating of, for example,  black with white will—-taking it by and large—-produce black, white and mulatto offspring in a certain numerical proportion. (Mendel was very good in Maths).

The Limerick??
There was a young lady of Starky,  Who had an affair with a darkie.  The results of their sins  were quadruplets, not twins,  One black, one white, and two khaki.
A Bonus Limerick:
There was a young lady named Bright,  Whose speed was much faster than light. She set off one day In a relative way,  And returned the previous night.
Finally, to me Smt. Shanthi Subra’s rejoinder appeared to be more of a caustic remark on ‘MK’ than eulogizing him on his unsolicited advice on ‘kalarppu kalyaanam’.
Warm rgds
AVM~V
20-01-10
**PS:
The foundations of the modern science of genetics were laid by Gregor Mendel, an Austrian Monk, who carried out experiments on the inheritance of characters between generations. Mendel worked on inheritance in sweet-peas, and selected characters that bred true; that is, the characters did not blend into one another in the next generation. Characters chosen for study by Mendel included flower colour (such as red versus white), plant height (tall versus dwarf), seed coat (smooth-coated seeds verses wrinkled seeds), pod length (long pods versus short pods), and so on. Mendal eventually formulated the three laws of genetics, known today as the Mendelian laws of inheritance. These are the law of Segregation, the law of Independent Assortment,  and the law of Dominance. Mendel’s work went unnoticed for nearly two decades after his death in 1887, but was eventually recognized widely by the scientific
community.
Sarvasya cha Aham hrudi samnivishta:
(‘I’ am installed in the hearts of everyone)
–(Gita 15.15)

10 thoughts on “Result of love marriage

  1. Dear Brahmins,
    I recently happened to attend a court as witness. While I was waiting I witnessed one trial of divorce case.
    The girl about 29 years fair good looking smart.
    She is a teacher.Ofcourse a bramin.Married for about 6 years and have one child.Her husband is a businessman. Inlaws such is sister,brother, father & mother inlaws are there.
    Problem – Her husband drinks and abuses her. Her inlaws cook and eat non-vegetarian food. Their languages are native and not printable.She has got bad experience every day unable to stay. One fine morning she returns to her abandoned parents because she ran away to get married to a non-brahmin boy.
    Now she realised how uncultured these people
    are. Judge asked whether love marriage – YES
    How long you loved – more than one year
    Did you know they are not of your caste and culture – YES. Did you know they eat non-vegetarian – YES. Did you know your husband drank – YES but occassionally.(Hope she admired at that time since drinking is considered is one of the heroic act by the teenagers)
    Then what is your compliant – She is unable to
    answer because what she expected and what was the realthing. Our culture is so superior to others she realised now.
    Since court cannot accept this she has invented a new thing – THEY TOURTURE for dowry which she could not prove. Court does not accept her point ask her to go four councelling with her husband and come back.
    She wept and went back. Now she realises the
    mistake of love with other cultured people but may be too late. Since her parents has no other way they have to support her.
    Does our girls realise this. Kindly show this to
    your children and spread the message.
    Chandrasekaran

  2. Are all “love marriages” bad?
    Are all inter-caste marriages bad?
    Are all “arranged marriages” good?
    Should divorce be avoided, under any circumstances, when things have become very bitter?
    What is the compromise between ancient traditions and modern circumstances of living–with referance to marriage and divorce?
    Can we have a calm and open discussion?

  3. Hello Elders and Learned Brahmins
    There is sincerity in the way we put forth our belief to ensure the continued growth of our community, culture & wisdom. Every brahmin family strives to inculcate these qualities in their family. We are also taught tolerance and respect other cultures.
    However, the views of some forum members just appease me in the manner which inter caste marriages have been described. It is true some marriages have turned sour for some our community members but it should not be generalized for the entire community. But there is a lot of Brahmins married to other communities are enjoying blissful life. My own brother and sister have married into other community and have a happy married life which makes us all very happy.
    Unhappy marriages are results of conflicts in individual mindset & lifetsyle. The caste/ community are totally irrelevant. If they have a mutual understanding and mature enough to handle life situation, they experience marriage bliss. However, if they have challenges then the marriage will hit rough weather.
    To quote judges questions on caste and food habits is least relevant to say. I have had Brahmin couple who split because the boy had a split personality. Now would that mean all Brahmin boys will have split personality? That would mean father of every Brahmin girl would require the boys parents to provide a doctors certificate on his being sound mind.
    Finally I wish to emphasize that Brahmin is a respected community thanks to our knowledge of Vedas. Let us all strive to sow the seeds of this knowledge in our children instead of teaching them to differentiate between caste and creed. Let us show tolerance and understanding. Let our children lead their own life and we provide guidance when they require them, instead of forcing our ideals on them.

  4. Sri.Anand moorthy’s matured thoughts and decent exposition should serve as a guide for discussing the sensitive but serious issue of inter caste marriage. This is a two way traffic; girls from other castes are entering Brahmin house holds and girls from here are attracted by the other side. too. It has happened even in the olden days when there were concrete walls, but in a small way; now the migration is in a much larger scale as there are no fences in between. We are becoming part of a large global family.
    Incompatibility in food habits between vegetarian and non vegetarian partners create a major problem. Worry about the life style and behavior of the progeny, mental set up of elders to accept the reality and if the couple are in India the worry about the social acceptance- there are many such problems to overcome and the boy and girl should discuss in detail before taking a final decision.
    Parents are not the decision makers but they can give their views and try to convince the youngsters. But if they take the attitude that pre-marriage love is not permissible, that is not practical. It has not worked before and will not work in the future. The great epics like Kumarasambhavam and Sakunthalam would not have been born if man and woman start loving only after living together as husband and wife.
    How monotonous life will be without love between a man and a woman and how empty my library will be without love stories and poems .
    Love and regards,
    Siva

  5. IN OUR HINDU MYTHOLOGY… . WE HAVE EXAMPLES FOR PREMARITAL CHILD BIRTH…
    THE CHILDREN ARE SOME OF THE BEST SATPURUSHAS. …..
    KARNA AND BHARATH…..
    ANBUDAN
    CHEENU

    1. Anbaarndha Cheenu ji
      My 1 cent…….. in the hot topic being exchanged, which also makes good read and gain knowledge.
      KARNA and BHARATH as quoted by you are KSHATIYAS and NOT “Brahmins puritans”,
      I guess.
      Kind Regards
      Shanti Subramanian
      PS: No offence intended, but to substantiate…………….

    2. Am deeply obliged to Sri Srinivasan S for elucidation of what is “our Hindu mythology”, of which I am woefully ignorant. Grateful to know whether Hariharaputhra Shaasthaa was also a pre-marital child?
      Jesus X Christ, the Nazarene Rex Judaeorum of the Aramaic tribe of Semitic peoples, was a shining example of pre-marital child birth. By definition, He is one of the best examples of Sathpurushas. Let us all embed Him in our “mythology” and daily worship him. Forget that his followers have slaughtered Hindus beyond number, enslaved even more, plundered their temples and their wealth through the centuries.
      S Narayanaswamy Iyer

  6. Dear fellow-Brahmins
    Fine. Support, tolerate, encourage pre-nuptial promiscuity? It is modern reality? It is already there, and expanding exponentially? It is natural? It is inevitable? Just close both eyes, and carry on?
    This death-wish for our community is not something that I think members of this 4Brahmins website (or any ofher Hindu website) should approve.
    What is thne next stage of development? Trial marriages? Between castes? A profusion of illegitimate births? Multiplying one-parent families? New-borns abandoned in garbage cans?
    When I and family were last in US, I read that abortion rates were highest among the teen and sub-teen age-groups of girls; that more than 50% of illegitimate births were among teen and sub-teen Negro girls and mixed Negro-other race girls.
    Our leftist-liberal Brahmins might possibly wish to take note that their advocacy might well result in the same situation migrating to surviving endangered Indian Brahmins. And there will be no one to perform their anthi kriyas, put on upaveetham, ultimatel;y no Brahmins at all.
    S Narayanaswamy Iyer

  7. Rather than looking at this issue superficially and coming to wrong conclusions , I would like to do my effort best in explaining this , based on my years long thinking and analysis of our culture.
    Love marriage is a very old concept in India. Even Kalidasa speaks of Love. Love comes mingled with lust as well, the two cannot be separated. Similarly there is lust even after marriage. The difference in the two things are, in an arranged marriage with the parents being active decision makers, lust is never a factor in the decision and in a love marriage lust is one of the important ingredients in making the whole love phenomena. Now there is nothing wrong in lust being an important ingredient in marriage consideration, as long as it remains just one factor.However for certain sections of population, love marriages based as they are on lust, is not entertained, even though if it happens is not banned. One of the sections to whom this strongly applies is the brahmin community whose most important responsibility is to prevent the bachelors from having any kind of lust or distraction until the marriage commences. There is a good reason, before a person falls in love and the girl also reciprocates and recognizes it to be a love,he cannot possibly be aware that he would marry that girl. A society based on such a marriage concept, forces the bachelor to invest time on this event- which is not good at all for brahimin bachelors whose life’s responsibility is completely different. Thus we have now separated the reason why the concept of arranged marriage is there in the first place- To prevent youngsters from being distracted and indulging in misadventures.
    Now intercaste marriage is again a different discussion altogether. I withhold from discussing this here. Rest assured it is not a simplistic discussion either

  8. Dear Chandasekaran sir,
    The reason why the lady even went to divorce court is because it was a “love” marriage, and by popular notion, love marriages are more set to fail.
    Had this been an arranged marriage, in the same caste, with the same person, someone in the highly experienced society would have influenced the girl to wait it out, etc etc. This is the unfortunate truth in the society.
    Coming to “caste”, I do not see how it is still relevant in today’s society. Earlier, brahmins were supposed to be the highest caste, their primary responsiblity being dissemination of knowledge and learning scriptures. Today, a brahmin does the same work that someone from another caste may be doing (and which is perfectly normal).
    I believe that in today’s world, we have enough complexities, and removing one of them which has become irrelevant, would be the best way to move the country forward. If someone can point me to some other text/book/essay that provides justification against my argument, I would love to see their point of view.
    In the meantime, I leave you with this poem.
    Regards,
    A person blessed with an “inter caste” marriage.

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